Do you ever practice what you’d say to a celebrity so that you don’t fuck it up in your imaginary meeting?


If I ever run into Krist Novoselic I want to be able to play it cool and be all, “Hey man, big fan! How’s <current band>1It’s: Giants in the Trees going?”

Yes, I just want to seem like an active follower of his career. We both know I’m just another Nirvana nerd about to pee myself. With practice I hope to project a “I’m a simple star struck nerd and you’ll be able to leave with nothing but a shoulder shrug”-vibe.

He’d use our tall-balding-guy connection to understand the vibe perfectly and respond with a simple “Good.” He’d just tilt his head a little with the “I gotta go” face and head out.

He’d even have the decency to not glance back at my sad “it was an honor to meet you!”, because if he did… he’d see the “this dude’s about to do the wayne’s world we’re not worthy” staring right back at him.

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